Potty Training Chronicles (Part 5) - Standing Up

Wednesday morning, Nathan finally woke up and came out of his room. I was on the phone with Mike at the moment, so I sent him on back to the bathroom. He comes back out with all of his undies and pants down around his ankles, as is his usual style. So, as I’m still on the phone with Mike (and thankfully not someone else less close to the situation) I call him over to help him get everything pulled back up. Here’s how it went…

Mom: Son, you need to pull your pants up BEFORE leaving the bathroom. Come here.

Son: I’m wet.

Mom: (Confused) Did you go tee-tee?

Son: Yes!! I went tee-tee!!

Mom: (Noticing wetness on son’s bare legs and on pajamas) Did you stand up to tee-tee?

Son: (Really excited) YES!

Mom: *sigh*

Dad: (Only somewhat stifling uncontrollable laughter) Um, I’d better let you go take care of that. Uh, good luck.

Mom: Gee, thanks.

So, the scene in the bathroom once we got there. Imagine pee everywhere… and I mean EVERYWHERE. This was the first time he had ever done this so: the seat was down with pee all over it, there was pee dripping down the side of the toilet, there was pee on the floor… the wall, I forgot to check the wall…

This is a joy that all you mom’s of girls just simply cannot comprehend. Learning how to pee standing up.

It gets better… but Mike is going to have to tell the next story from Wednesday evening.

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Right before dinner Wednesday evening I took Nathan to go potty and wash his hands. He was very excited to show me how he could stand up to pee. We got to the bathroom and he proceeded to get his stepstool set up in front of the toilet. The placement had to be perfect, I guess, because many adjustments were necessary before he was happy with it. Finally, he stood up on the stool and proceeded to raise the seat. Now, I was too busy thinking about what a smart move that is (he does share the bathroom with his sister, after all) to consider how far back he was standing. Once he got the seat up, though, it became apparent that he was having trouble standing back up straight. I was debating with myself whether I should help him or let him figure it out on his own when he decided to just go for it. His initial momentum carried him about halfway up, but he just didn’t have the leverage to complete the move.

Back down he went – splash! Arms first into the toilet. He wasn’t really sure what to do at this point, and my laughter probably didn’t help. I reached over and helped him stand up while keeping his dripping arms over the toilet. After drying him off with a washcloth, I moved his stool closer and showed him how to lift the seat from the side before getting on the stool. Now it was time to try again. He stood there for a while with nothing happening.

Dad: Do you need to go tee-tee?

Son: No.

Dad: Ok, then let’s wash hands and go eat dinner.

Son: NOOOOOO! I wanna go tee-tee!

Dad: Ok, Ok.

So we waited… in silence...




Dad: Look, if there is no tee-tee, then let’s just go.

Now, this whole time he has been shaking and wiggling trying to go. Finally, as he is staring at it, and it is pointed back up at him, the tee-tee comes. Straight up. Toward his face. Luckily, his shirt stops it and he gets it pointed back at the toilet. Not in the toilet, but AT the toilet. The tank, the seat, the lid – basically every part of the toilet except the bowl with the water in it.

Dad: (reaching over to help) Point it in the bowl, son. No, no – that’s too far – that’s your leg. That’s good, in the bowl. Oh, you’re done. Well, you got some in there – we’ll call it a draw.

Clean up took a few minutes. I suggested changing clothes (at least the shirt) but he was having none of it. I finally decided that it wasn’t that bad and bath time was just around the corner anyway, so off to dinner we went – proudly telling mom how he had gone tee-tee standing up.