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Friday, January 23, 2009

Insecurity

You know the feeling. That sinking feeling that someone doesn’t like you. Or that they’re out to get you. Or that they don’t think very much of you and your abilities.

Insecurity.

Who would have thought that someone as prideful as I can be would have such strong feelings of inferiority and insecurity. But it’s there. And I’m just thankful that I can recognize it for what it is because I don’t know that I would have before a few days ago.

A few days ago, over at the LPM blog, Beth Moore wrote this post about insecurity and asked us to anonymously share our stories of how insecurity has made a fool out of us. Just thinking about it was eye opening for me. I never realized how insecure I can be at times and how it manifests itself in my actions.

Some things have happened recently that have got me realizing how insecure I can really be at times. At first I get mad because something doesn’t go how I think it should. Then as I refuse to act in anger, I think about the situation and the vain imaginations begin of seeing something sinister behind what happened. Then as other things happen, that are likely unrelated whatsoever, my brain begins to add 0 + 0 and gets 200! I’m on overload at this point and almost cannot control the insecure thoughts and feelings.

But I decided today that it will not make a fool out of me. I refuse to acknowledge it in my actions. And I am seeking scripture to recite to replace the thoughts.

3 Comments:

PBandJ Boats said...

Oh girl, this a been a MAJOR struggle for me lately! Thanks for the post!

Gayle @ thewestiecrew said...

Oh Donna, I absolutely relate to this 650%.
Insecurity is such a wicked scheme of the enemy to cause dissention within the Body of Christ.
I'm there, girl. When you get your scriptures, would you give me a head's up if you post?

Tiffany said...

Sadly, you can include me in this club. I think if we could see other people's thoughts we would realize that we all think we are dorky!