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Thursday, October 8, 2009

It's Tough Being a Woman

This summer, my friend Keal and I went through Beth Moore's Esther Bible study. And when I say that we did it this summer, I mean we goofed around most of the summer and finally started it in late July and then pushed through and got it done before we started BSF in mid-September.

But the important thing is that we did it, right? Right.

I'll tell you. If you are a woman and you haven't done this study yet, you need to find you a group that's doing it and get 'er done. 'Cuz it is GOOO-OOOD!

If you have done this study, you know that in every video session Mrs. Beth reads from what she calls "The RED Book." It is a compilation of the responses that over 400 women gave on the LPM Blog in this post back in July, 2007 to the question, "For you, what are the three toughest things about being a woman?"

Well, I was not blogging nor did I read the LPM blog at the time that this question was asked back in July, 2007. So I didn’t get to answer.

There. I said it. None of the answers that she read were mine.

But being one that never wants to be left out of giving her own opinion, I decided that I’d make you all suffer through let you all enjoy my answers to “What are the three toughest things about being a woman?”


1). Living in light of the “superwoman myth / syndrome.” Buying into the idea that we can do/have it all and have it perfectly: a beautiful family, well behaved children, an advancing career, quality time to ourselves and, as a Christian, a vibrant and growing relationship with the Lord.

There is a huge blow to the psyche that feeds feelings of inadequacy and insecurity when you figure out that you are human and that, just like every other human on planet earth, you have only 24 hours in a day and cannot be two (or three or four) places at once.

Choices must be made. We must choose good over bad and best over good; not only for ourselves, but in many cases for our children and for our families in general. And that is a huge responsibility to have placed on us.

2). When age sets in and our body does not respond as quickly as we’d like… except when it is gaining weight. We have an image, partially driven by the media, of what we ought to look like and it is unattainable. And yet, we feel inadequate when we cannot attain that level of thinness and beauty. We are goaded into buying products and services that, we are told, “will make it happen” with little to no effort on our part.

3). Dealing with the expectations that are placed on us by our women-friends. I’m one of those women who was mostly friends with guys during my school years. However, now being married, my best friend is my husband and I do not allow myself to have close friendly relationships with men, even though I find them much easier to get along with. I am baffled by many women-friend things and sometimes have difficulty with how I am supposed to act in a given social situation and wonder why I am so uncomfortable around many large groups of women.


I learned so much and the study of this Biblical character who was singled out for God’s purposes for “such a time as this,” spoke so clearly to where I have been in my own life lately.

It was especially encouraging for me to realize that many Biblical figures were called to corporate crisis in the midst of their own personal crises. Esther, for instance, was called to deal with the crisis that was facing her people corporately while seemingly in the midst of a personal marriage crisis since her husband had not called for her or requested her presence in an entire month. And if it happened to those in scripture, then certainly God may call us to serve in times of corporate crisis when we are in the midst of dealing with personal crisis. That was extremely encouraging to me.

You see, I have been called to serve in a way that I never thought would be asked of me. I have been called to serve our corporate church on a team as we search for a new Children’s Pastor. And yet, I have been in a season where the Lord has taken my involvement in so many things away as we have been dealing with our own family’s difficulty in our financial situation while we have not had the full income to which we had become accustomed. I was very conflicted on whether or not to accept this position, but did. And this study encouraged me that God was calling me to serve in dealing with a corporate crisis in the midst of our own personal crisis at home.

There were many other things, principles and truths sprinkled throughout this study that spoke to me and encouraged me in my walk, but this is the one, as simple as it is, that stands out the most.

I also want to add that given the last point listed above, you might find it laughable that I have become friends with several women on the Internet that are all readers of the Living Proof Ministries blog. We are called Siestas. (It’s a story that is explained over on the LPM Blog.) And I am going to meet several of them for the first time when I go to Memphis on Friday for a Living Proof Live event. But, given this last point, you should not be surprised for me to say that I have been dealing with thoughts of insecurity about not fitting in with some of them just like I have never felt that I really fit in with big groups of girls my whole life.

“But trust reverses the detours of adversity into the highways of destiny.” (Beth Moore, Esther) And I trust that it will be an incredible weekend and that God has a special Word just for me that will bring me that much closer to fulfilling my destiny in Him.

I plan to have a ton to tell you next week about the awesome things that God has done through this trip to Memphis.


Melinda said...

Esther, Beth and You were not kidding when you all said it was tough being a IS. But I want you to know this: You are going to fit RIGHT IN with that group of Siestas. You can take THAT to the bank.

I absolutely canNOT wait!

Love you sweet Donna,

beyond this moment said...

Insecurity? I know nothing of insecurity. Hah! My Siesta Fiesta trip was not so stellar because of said insecurity. I let it get the best of me.

I know you'll do better. =) You're so sweet and friendly.

pipedi said...

I haven't been to an LPL event yet - partly because of logistics, and partly because I'm a little uncomfortable about the hugging/vulnerability thing I see in the recaps on Beth's blog. I know I'm missing out because of my insecurity.

I hope you don't let that same kind of thing stop you from receiving all that God wants you to from it. "Be strong and very courageous!"

Tiffany said...

Great items you listed. In fact, they reminded me of my last post cuz it's sorta related. We have some of the same things on our minds!

Have a wonderful trip! I cannot afford to fly anywhere for a get together with my fave girl-peeps just now (my sisters), but I DO get to attend Women of Faith this weekend because of tickets given to me by my husband's employer who has a box there. I am excited!

Laughing Momma said...

I am so glad that we got a face to face last weekend....I only wish we could have had more time.

I remember that LPBlog post....and shared my 2 cents...but have yet to do the Ester study.

Gonna run so that I can stalk your blog for awhile.

Praise the Lord you were not injured in the accident...seems like the Darkside was giving a little payback for all the Praisin' we did Friday and Saturday.